Weeds grow where they want to; not where they're told to...


Cath Nichols


How to Tell Your Story


In writing your memoir, remember not to be truthful,

I guess that your circumstances are straitened

since we last spoke, and the pressure to be female

has returned. You need the cash of a kiss and tell -

get your cover story straight: judge

the climate of your time before going into print.


Some periods of history require heroics,

but display a lack of curiosity as to sexual preferences;

they take no fear - or delight - in lesbian inferences.

It’s not until the nineteenth century that the frisson

of a cross-dressed woman really comes into its own.

Post 1800 feel free to flirt with women in your audience.


Before this time you must play upon your celibacy,

fashion your adventures as a modern Joan of Arc:

burn with a passion for your country. Do not confess

to a love of the dress or uniform, nor a need for male respect

and a situation in life where what’s between your legs

is less of an issue than how well you fire a musket.


Cultivate your sea legs, and do nothing to rock the boat.







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